Relationship Problems Can Be Solved!
You can solve relationship problems with a clear vision of what you are both wanting in your relationship. Here is how to go about it…
This exercise is found in my book Picture Your Life. We need a clear picture of what we want our relationship to be so we can focus on having it.
Name 3-5 happy things about your marriage
Name 3-5 ways things could improve
Name 3-5 specific things your partner could do to make you happier
For the week work on these issues
Get each family member to do the signature strengths survey on the web site authentic happiness. If one family member is too young or is unwilling to do it, incorporate things they value such as being kind or appreciating music into the family vision statement.
The statement should reflect some of the values that are really important to each family member. For example, kindness may be one person’s value, and love of beauty another person’s. The mission statement could include a statement like: “We are a family which does their best to be forgiving and kind to one another.
We would like our home to be a place of beauty and order, yet relaxed and loving.” Make sure the statement is concise and do-able with room to grow into. For example, create a statement like: “We try to be forgiving,” rather than: “We will never hurt each other.” A mission statement is the rudder of the family. It keeps it on course during stormy times such as raising a troubled teen or a devastating illness or loss of a loved one.
Keep doing the exercise in week one. Some of the learning from this can be put into the vision statement as well.
Problems in relationships can be complex. If you would like an affordable session with me via Skype, on the phone or in person call or email me the number is at the bottom of the page.
Meet as a family and as a couple separately to hold one another accountable to the statement. Adjust the statement as needed. This exercise goes a long way to solve relationship problems. Keep doing the exercise in week one.
Do your best to make comments to your partner and your children on how they are using their signature strengths. Meet with your partner to see how you are both doing with this exercise.